Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize