so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
