It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Randomize
