It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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