At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
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