dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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