It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize