She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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