i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
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