Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
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