Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
