god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
