Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
