Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
