who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
