How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
