I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
