Im at strip club and am horny
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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