we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize