I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
