I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
