Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
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