We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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