it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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