You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
