Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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