D3 body, D1 cock
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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