We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
