fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize