so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
