I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
