With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
