im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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