In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Can you bring me the toilet please
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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