Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
