just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize