So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
