this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
