I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
third nipple confirmed
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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