I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize