so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
