YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize