I want to make a zoo with you.
...so i touched it.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize