she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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