We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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