New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
