dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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