yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
