ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize
