She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
