I heard we made out
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
